Dear sir,
Thank you for your letter,
We think it's important
What you had to say
We try
Our best to make sure
All our products reach the highest
Standards today
And we're sorry you were unsatisfied
And we're sorry your item broke
And we hope you'll accept these vouchers
In lieu of compensation
Dear sir,
We take it very seriously
When a customer
Lets us know what's wrong
We regret
Our service was so bad
That you put it
Into a song
And we're sorry you were unsatisfied...
'Cos it's a tricky situation
Of course we can't refund the money that you lost
So in lieu of compensation
Here are some vouchers to cover the cost
Never mind the mental anguish
Or the travel, or the time
You don't seem to be physically damaged
So really, everything's fine